The Ampersand Files
by marylouleach
Summary: Song fic. Send me your song tittle and the writer/singer of said song I'll make a quick little story out of it. Inbox me on my Tumblr at Marylousfanfictionspace or inbox me here or ...my email...ect. you know how this goes. This was suggested by an anon, said anon thought it could help with my writer's block. I think it's working lol. this is a mix of AU, Johnlock, friendship, ect.
_**Chapter 1: Wrecking Ball**_

 _ **THIS WAS A SONG Prompt LOL WRECKING BALL BY MILEY Cyrus. NOT A FAN BUT THE LYRICS ARE BEAUTIFUL. NOT SO MUCH THE VIDEO. ENJOY LOVELIES….**_

John stands in the dark of a hospital room, his blue eyes distant. His concentration is far from whatever scenes play out on the side walk below the stone building. Somewhere in his head he hears the echo of his screams and the thud of a body hitting cement. Blood, darkest crimson spilling, and staining. The pool was so real the scent of his mates blood had been overwhelming, the sudden breaking of their bond, like a string pulled tight then slowly sawed at until it frayed and split. It had knocked the wind from John's very lungs, nearly killing him and the life that grew unknowingly within. Had it not been for said life john was sure he would have died. And that was proof of his mates love , or lack there of.

The thoughtless breaking of a bond. It had been easily done and without second thought to John's well being. His fucking breaking heart. He is wearing his blue stripped shirt, his arm in a sling. The omega takes a breath, unsteadily he turns fully towards the large picture window. Up until now he had only been partially facing.

"Don't talk. " he manages, his voice hoarse but unquestionably steady. He is looking at the reflection of a ghost in the clear glass of the window. Not ready to face him, even after all these years. He notes sadly the sun has nearly set, the shadows dance across the buildings near by.

"Just Listen. I deserve that much. " John doesn't wait for the Alpha's permission. Having vowed long ago to never wait for it, from any Alpha. This one was no different from the others. "This is my fault. I pursued you. You never wanted this-me. I came in like a wrecking ball. I put you on such a fucking pedestal. Like you were so unobtainable. I actually thought you were better than me. That I should be glad with whatever you were willing to give me. "

"I did this for you John…for us. You must see that. I didn't have a choice he was going to kill you. I couldn't live with a threat against you, hanging over our heads. I had to end it. Not just him but his very empire! Eliminating any further actions! Please will you look at me? Just please! Don't walk away from us!"

"Me? You selfish bastard! Don't you say its me walking away! I've always wanted you! I wanted to break the walls you had built! You kept everyone out. Pushed people back, distancing yourself. I thought I was different, I thought I had broken through. I hadn't."

"John-you are the only one I've ever loved. You can see that. You of all people should be able to see it?"

The familiar condescending tone hit John's frayed nerves harder than any slap.

"All you've ever done is wreck me! You left! You burned us! I will always want you, you idiot! But I wont be left behind, I wont be a second thought. You say you did this, this act. You did it for me? So this war was my fault? I should have never made you notice me. I wanted to tear down your defenses these walls you erected. I was a fool thinking i made progress."

"John. I love you! Please look at me." The Alpha's plea would have any omega whimpering in response but john had to be strong. three long years with a broken bond had taught him to be strong. Instead he growled and hissed.

" You should have let me in. Too much is on the line now. You made your decision and I must make mine. I loved you. I really believed that because you treated me like your equal, I might actually have a place in your heart. Stupid me. You couldn't even trust me to know you were alive. Instead you went off on your own. You should have let me in. Well you were right Sherlock Holmes."

John hated how his voice wavered saying his ex bond mates name. Hated how his free hand clinched into a tight fist at his side. "Alone does protect us. Goodbye."

John turned to look this Alpha in the eyes. Ignoring the way his own mouth went dry and his heart pounded as if wishing to explode from his chest. His whole being wanting to be closer to the man that had been absent for three years. He couldn't let him back, it wasn't just **his** heart on the line anymore. The run in with a knife wielding assassin was just a reminder of the dangers that followed the man. John couldn't be apart of that world. Sherlock Holmes wasn't his anymore, and John couldn't allow the erratic unpredictable bastard into his life.

"Daddy!" A small voice broke the tension of the hospital room.

"Sig!" John hear his sister's familiar voice, he heard her intake of breath and sudden growl in anger and surprise. John's dark haired pup was clinging to his leg. Demanding attention and reassurance.

"Harry! Not now. I ll explain-"

"You have some fucking nerve! " she swore staring towards the Alpha who was standing wide eyed an frozen all focus now on the small child hugging John's left leg.

"John-" Sherlock stepped forward wanting answers that his mind already deduced. His heart was denying the truth that was so plainly written.

"Daddy. Who's he?" The child stared up at the tall dark haired Alpha in the long coat with a sad face. The boy was suspicious and he glared at Sherlock.

" He is nobody Sigerson. Just someone that used to know your dead papa. But we are going home you and I. He will not be visiting or stopping by." John took his son's small hand and pushed his taller blond sister towards the door. Harry shot several glares over her shoulder but ultimately followed her brother's lead.

"I suppose you can fill me in on the way home" Sherlock heard the blond Alpha grumble leaving him in a state of shock.

 **"You should have let me in."** John's words stung more than ever. He was back, Moriarty's empire was done-shattered and forever broken. He expected John to return to him, understanding and forgiving. This wasn't what he thought. And the child? John had a pup? He had a son? Sherlock was a father? He had a son he didn't know, would perhaps never get the chance to.

Moriarty had said he would cut the heart out of the consulting detective, the mad man had said that he would burn him. Now, as Sherlock stood watching his family leave that room without another word, the realization that his dead enemy had done just that nearly brought the man to his knees. The heart from his chest had been taken, he could feel nothing but pain.


End file.
